My trip to State Theater 🎭!

 Good morning/afternoon/evening, you beautiful people!

On the 26th of April 2023, I had the absolute honour of being invited by my college to visit The South African State Theatre.  

I have wanted to visit the State Theatre for over a year now and it felt like a dream come true. I have always loved the arts and it was an absolute honour to be able to watch Dr John Kani's drama, " Kunene and The King". I am such a huge fan of Dr Kani and I was in awe of the creative genius that stood and performed before me. I was lucky enough to have a front seat view, I saw the performance up close and it was incredible to witness.

The drama follows the journey of a black South African man and a white South African man who have both lived through the destructive era, known as 'Apartheid', meaning separation. This was basically a very racist era in my country, where people of colour in particular black people were separated from white people and forced to only live in certain within certain areas in their own mother land. This drama was quite thought-provoking and eye-opening because both races, namely black and white tend to have a very different view on what Apartheid was and how it still affects us today, 25+years later. Mr Kunene plays a sister (yes, male nurse are also called sisters, it's a profession not a gender based name) 

I thoroughly enjoyed the performance  and I was completely sucked into this world onstage. I truly love the arts and my admiration has grown immensely from seeing the stage productions and just how many people it takes to pull off a show. It was also really interesting to see the set being changed around, right in front of our eyes and how they made those scenes interesting by having a singer come on set and play an instrument as the set was changed for the next scene. 

It took me so long to finally post this blog update, more than two months to be exact and I can't exactly tell you why I waited so long because it thinking about what about amazing time I had at the theater, I cannot wait until my next visit!

P.S Instagram saw it first! So follow me there!
instagram.com/ruthyzikhali

All my love ❤️

Ruthy 

July Updates: Dealing with loss and finding the will to live

Good morning/afternoon/evening, you beautiful people! 

It's Sunday and what a beautiful day it was!  Friday was a difficult day for me as it was a friend's 21st or rather what would have been her 21st. Reflecting on her beautiful, short life and the incredible confident and friend that she was, it was an emotional weekend. It brings me comfort remembering her and as the years go by whenever I think of her, it gives me the courage to live and to try. She wanted so much and was deserving of it all and whenever I think that I am unworthy of something. I remember that her legacy lives on in me too. 

Your legacy lives on, in the lives that you have touched because people will always remember how you made them feel. So if anyone is feeling like I am or has ever felt the way I do, know that by living on and being strong. You are carrying your loved one's legacy with you. Whether you feel healed enough to openly talk about or it is still a wound sensitive to touch, remembering them is not a crime.

 Don't dwell on the negative things that may have happened between the two of you. It's tempting for me to remember how I could and perhaps should have been a better friend but at this point what good would that do, as I cannot go back and be better?

Cherish the sweet memories, cry out the bad ones and know that you carry your loved one's legacy, should you choose to do so ❤️! 

I pray that we finish the month of July strong in body and in spirit and may the Lord God grant us peace, joy and comfort. For He is a Comforter. Ending off this week and marching off into a new and busy one, instead of a question I'll leave you with a song, one that I have been playing recently. "Comforter" by CeCe Winans, it's been helping me through a lot!

All my love ❤️

Ruthy

May Reflections

Good morning/afternoon/evening, you beautiful people! 

A little late update today but here we are! At the time of this upload, it's July 17th 2023 and school has reopened, so my long winter break is officially over and it's time to to hustle and grind but I couldn't be more grateful ❤️!

I present to you some lessons that I have learnt in the month of May, this year. 

 1) God allows lessons to repeat themselves until you finally understand 

Just how a good teacher will explain the same concept until his students understand and are enriched with knowledge and understanding. So, if deja vu is something that you are familiar with, rather ask what can I learn, how can I grow, instead of why?

2) Be rooted and grounded like a tree, don't be like a candle🕯 in the wind 🍃 

Do not allow yourself to be easily moved by difficult circumstances. Choose a stance and root yourself in your decision. Sometimes indecisiveness can be dangerous because you have not made up your mind to be strong and of good courage. 

3) It's better to walk alone, than to walk with green snakes in the green grass

We all seek company, it's normal, it's human but keeping the rather company is poison and worse than loneliness. Pick your groupies with care!

4) A Frenemy is worse than an enemy 

This lesson was the one that I was the most indenial about. I observe people closely and I don't lie to myself about how I feel about them and I also observe to see how they feel about me. I assumed that I can still work very closely with someone who dislikes me but works very hard to hide it. People who hide their dislike for you are green snakes in the green grass, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike because only those closest to you can do the most damage. Do not try and spend unnecessary time with people who pretend, the truth will always sent you free, free from lies 🤥 and difficult situations. So, please remember that someone who dislikes you openly has more integrity than someone who tries to hide it and disguise themselves as a 'friend' .

5) Oceans of emotions are not forever (even salt water is all that you taste)

As someone who struggles with depression, life can feel so gloomy and difficult. I have learnt that in life there are seasons for everything in life and that my sorrow too shall pass. I have committed myself to living because I trust that my pain and discomfort serves a greater purpose and all I need do is wait. So, wait it out and don't make hasty decisions when your headspace is foggy. Take a nap, write it out, scream, drink camomile or comfrey tea, talk to a trusted person or a professional, pray about your situation and take your struggles to God. Knowing that your ocean of emotion does not define you, it does not make you a bad person and it is more than okay to feel your feelings. 

6) It's okay to mind my business and leave after I have finished ( sometimes on what I shouldn't be waiting on / for can lead to trouble) It's okay to leave the room

I understood this recently but knowing when to leave is important. Having and honing the ability to mind my own business and not be nosy and stay longer in situations and places is so important. It's okay to leave, it's okay not to gossip and to live a quiet life and work with your own hands. I find that the more I focus on my own  business, more of my life prospers and flourishes.

7) Be willing to unlearn

Different people value and like different things. Be willing and able to mold and adjust, as long as it does not compromise your morals. Being flexible and not narrow minded and not so set in your ways can help you to learn new things and grow 🌱.

8) Listen and observe, people tell you where they are at and what they want and need if only we have the ears to hear and the eyes to see. 

Question of week: What helps you to manage your emotions? 

Keep warm, friends! 

All my love 💜

Ruthy 

April Reflections: Part 2

Good morning/afternoon/evening, you beautiful people! 

April's second edition of my reflections are late to the party but here nonetheless! 

4) Journal

Write! Writing has been such an important part of my life but writing consistently has been so helpful and is such a powerful tool for me. I can honestly write down my feelings and thoughts and I can read back on past entries and see my growth. I highly recommend it as a young woman still discovering herself, this truly helps me.

5) Love and pray for your parents

"Don't make their problems yours, I am not my parents, I am not their strengths and weaknesses, losses and wins. I am my own person and I must never lose this thought". This is what I say to myself so, so often. I believe that we can get caught up in who our parents are and what they have achieved or w even where they failed, that as their offspring we forget that we are NOT them. We are connected but are walking two different paths, how different is up to you. I learnt to believe the lie that what my parents have good and bad are mine. I am choosing and molding the woman that I am becoming and just because my parents have done something amazing, it does not equate to my own achievements. In the same breath, the things that they do wrong do not equate to my failures. It is still a process but this knowledge has been life-changing for me.

6) Humans lie, even educated ones! 

People lie for all kinds of reasons, even seemingly none exist ones! Don't judge a person's integrity by their social class or level of education. Double check and verify information given to you until you truly know if someone has integrity and is worthy of your trust. 

7) Learn to be comfortable in your own presence

This means so much more than just being able to be alone comfortably. It means to actually enjoy yourself and your character. Your likes and your dislikes, you spend the most time with yourself and you can never run away from you. So make sure that you work on yourself and cultivate a woman or man that you are proud of and happy to spend time with.

8) Learn to embrace who you are and what you like, unashamedly 

We are so unique as human beings, no two sets of finger prints are identical that just goes to show your individuality and God's creativity! Do not conform to what the majority seems to like or enjoy. Allow yourself to fully be you! You only have one shot at the human experience, so make sure you spend time enjoying the things that you truly do enjoy, solo. You don't always need company to have a good time or to follow your heart. 

9) It's okay to unlearn 

What you once thought was right. As you mature and come into your own person, only you know what you value and you cannot live your life as someone else's. So feel free to unlearn what you had once been taught because at the end of the day you have to take responsibility for your own human experience and bear the consequences of your own choices.

This was such a fun reflection to write on! Enjoy mid-July, it truly feels like winter has arrived🥶! Stay warm, friends! Until next week!

Question of the week: What has brought you joy lately?

All my love 💚

Ruthy

Let's Talk: Turning 21, cultivating independence and my 2nd year in college.

Good morning/afternoon/evening, you beautiful people!

It's been awhile and I am so glad to be back! I will definitely be consistent with a new blog post every Sunday evening at 22:00 CAT! 

Two weeks ago I turned 21! A life-changing age, a milestone age, as I am now fully legal. To me, each year that I grow older I see as such a big blessing because I cannot bring breath to my body each day. I never truly imagined being 21, I always envisioned 18 but I stopped picturing my life and goals further on in my life. Now I definitely am!  I am in my second year of college and being 21 also means that I am also halfway through my college journey. A journey I began with God and the support of my mom because I had no idea where it would lead and to be honest I still do not see the whole picture but I am choosing to follow my heart. I felt drawn to it and while it's not always easy, I have never once regretted my decision and I am so proud of myself for listening to myself and not anyone else regarding such a big life decision.

Turning 21 has brought on such reflection in my life. As someone who is fully legal, how do I expect to independently be able to provide for myself? A question that has been bugging me for several months now, but a question that I have actually come to answer, with God's help! This has brought so much relief to my soul because I feel like this is such a big part of being an adult, true independence is also financial independence! 

21 means so much to me and I am looking forward to what adulthood has for me. I am also looking to to cultivating my dream life and doing more internal work. I am so excited to take you along on the journey, every Sunday at 22:00! I have not written on my blog in two months so it feels weird but I am so ready to get back into it! So many exciting updates for you all!!! 

Question of the week: What does getting older mean to you? (There's absolutely no wrong answer, whatever aging means to you is valid!)

All my love 💚

Ruthy